All posts tagged: airports

Patience = Tried

*written on a long layover in Newark being that my flight out of Toronto was mysteriously delayed for 2.5 hours so I missed my connection to Charleston. Here I sit at in the airport, thoroughly unsatisfied after a dinner of Corn Nuts, in the middle of my 10th hour stuck in one of two airports today. I’m at the point where I’m all but shrugging with resignation, for surely this is my lot in life. Here I am, spending what should be Friday happy hour among people wearing pajamas and Uggs as they plan to summer this weekend in Branson, or wherever their little hearts desire. Does that sound bitchy? I don’t mean to sound bitchy. I’m trying to be zen. I’m the point where I’m prone to existentialism. Why am I here for so many hours? Why am I prey to endless delays? Why do I possess intimate knowledge of which Hudson News has the macadamia white chocolate Cliff bars? I woke up early this morning in Toronto. It was gloriously sunny and clear out. Not a single possible …

If Only Airports Were Awesome…

*written at Houston Hobby Airport on what seems to be an endless layover  It happened again. My 3:15pm flight out of Memphis was delayed due to the airline deeming it important to check tires (I’m totally OK with that) and 75 minutes after my flight was scheduled to depart, I was called up to the gate because it was clear I’d never make my connection, so I was put on the last flight out of Houston at 10:10pm. Yet again. Stranded at the airport… But this isn’t the biggest problem in the world and it doesn’t make me full of rage. I mean, rage is just so tacky. In an admirable attempt to achieve pure zen-like consciousness (admire me, dammit!), I’ve resigned myself to the fact that any flight between New Orleans and another city that in actuality would only be a 1 hour flight or less but is so much more than that because there are no direct flights, is going to involve an entire day of traveling. I should be arriving to some awesome place where …

Inconveniently Vegan

*written at the Omni King Edward Hotel in Toronto and finished at Charlotte Douglas International Airport during a long layover One of the questions I keep hearing is, so you do all this traveling and you’re vegan… how do you eat? I’m not exactly wasting away, people. Sure, it’s not easy in the South (it was worse twenty years ago). It’s extremely easy in places like San Francisco. But. It’s never easy in the airport, a bastion for bad food (and taste, but that’s another subject altogether). While I can assure you that generally, yes, I do eat, quite well in fact, on my travel days I have to do a lot of snacking. With so many layovers, many of them involving barely enough time to get from gate to gate, I’m not going to have time for a sit-down in a restaurant that may or may not have an acceptable overpriced salad. I try my best to bring my own healthy snacks, but there are only so many Pro Bars one can eat without feeling sugar-sick. I love nuts, but I can’t …

I’ve Gotta Get Out Of This Place

*written on a Southwest flight from NOLA to Dallas on at noon on Wed 5/6/15 I’ve always been bewildered by people who travel a lot for work but have this utterly loathsome need to be grouchy about it. Their seemingly forced complaints would especially amuse me. “Can you believe they asked me last minute to go to Dubai next week? Now I’ll have to miss being a bridesmaid in my cousin’s Disney wedding!” So outrageously unfair. Exotic world travel or participating in the Cinderella wedding? No brainer. But then, there’s me: never a bridesmaid, never a bride. Here’s the funny thing: I have that kind of job. Well. Except for the “exotic world” part of travel (see my byline). As I write, I’m on my way to Birmingham, Alabama, y’all! Note: I am not being ironic. I’m pretty fucking thrilled if you must know, but I’ll get to exactly why in a moment. I may not get trips to Dubai or Paris (hey, I can do that on actual vacation time, thanks to accumulating those blessed credit card miles and this perk alone should make you mistrust anyone who tells you that traveling …